The last straw came when, Phoebe and Jay started snacking. I lied to them and said I needed to be at the hospital early. I grabbed my newest book: Are you there, Vodka? It's me Chelsea(thanks Lisa) and left the house. I drove to the parking lot at the hospital and waited for 2 hours for my appt time. With my stomach now begging for food, I went to Registration and waited for my name to be called so I could hand over the rest of my money since they hadn't sucked me dry on Friday. While I was sitting there, patiently, a woman and her clearly ignorant husband sat next to me. No problem, UNTIL, her SWEET hubby walked away and returned with some breakfast sweet rolls. SERIOUSLY, I thought, do not eat those near me. I fear he sensed the glaring daggers in my eyes and ate his big, sweet, succulent, warm, sugar coated roll somewhere else. Wise move on his part.
Oh ya, the MRI was a not a big deal. I laid down quietly as Deede started the IV and strapped me down and eased me into the tunnel of doom. I did listen to the hits on the radio, which was completely drowned out by the jack hammer blaring in my ear. No problem though, UNTIL, Hmmm. That cool, metalic taste his my throat. I'm not going to be sick in here..Uh oh, I think I am..I quickly squeezed my button and begged for help. Deede, rushed in with a nice little blue "barf" bag and saved the day. I certainly didn't want to have to be in charge of cleaning that machine. God bless, Deede for bringing me a cool cloth and shoving me back into the machine so that she could finish getting some pretty pictures of my liver. Being a photographer, I understood the importance of just finishing a photo session. 10 minutes later and I was out of there...Aaaaah. You know what that meant??FOOD and a much needed Diet Coke.
I ran to my car,knocking over the elderly, tripping small children and drove like a crazy woman to Wendy's. Did i have money, no, but I remembered a Visa rewards card that I got for filling out my health assessment for the insurance company a month before. I whipped into drive thru and ordered a Diet Coke and A Chicken Pecan Salad...I had 30cents to spare. I'm not lying when I say, I thought I heard Angels when I took that first bite. Oh, you probably think I drove home 30 minutes before I ate. Not a chance, I pulled into a spot in front of Sherwin Williams and shoved that salad into my mouth as fast as I could shovel it. Not a pretty picture, but I just didn't care.I was now, Free and Happy.
|Come to Momma, my sweet food.........|
|No time to even remove the bracelets..|
The lesson of this day, never schedule your own appts while under the influence of mind altering meds, never schedule a fasting appt after 9:00 in the morning and NEVER, EVER eat food in front of people wearing a hospital bracelet while sitting at registration. That's my story..